The Spirit of the Lord God is upon me; because the Lord hath anointed me…
To appoint unto them that mourn in Zion, to give unto them beauty for ashes, the oil of joy for mourning, the garment of praise for the spirit of heaviness; that they might be called trees of righteousness, the planting of the Lord, that he might be glorified.
Isaiah 61:3

her story

To say that affairs and adultery destroy a marriage is an understatement. For me, it was a devastation. In the aftermath, I discovered there was nothing left of the illusion of the happy marriage I once believed we had.

Why then did I stay in this marriage? To me, there were three logical choices: 1. I could stay with Rob in hopes of finally having a husband who listened, loved me unconditionally and truly cared for me from the depths. 2. I could start fresh with someone new in hopes that it would be better than what I once had. 3. I could live out the rest of my life alone which wasn’t a bad idea or maybe not live anymore, but how would that affect my children? For me, the best logical choice with the least amount of risk was to stay with Rob on a trial basis and see what happens. After all, I still loved him.

These past nearly two years have been a roller coaster of emotion as we salvage through the remains of our marriage searching for anything worth keeping. Rob has stayed the course, patiently loving me through every high and low. Working through adultery has been one of the hardest things I have ever done in my life. And in it all, God has been slowly taking the ashes of our lives and is creating something beautiful.

I can’t say I am one hundred percent healed yet. I am making progress little by little. We are doing better each day. And, since I was forced to endure such pain, I want to make it count by helping others, by being a listening ear, an understanding heart, or just a shoulder to cry on. I want to be a voice that says, you can make it. You will survive and you are not alone.

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